


The Pets of Darth Vader

by Tigressa101



Series: Rare Pairings [16]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Dominance, Gay Sex, Lust, M/M, Master/Pet, Master/Slave, Rough Oral Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Some Plot, Stormtrooper Culture (Star Wars), Top Anakin Skywalker | Darth Vader, Unrequited Lust, half of it is fuck all, half of it is story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:49:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28920852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigressa101/pseuds/Tigressa101
Summary: Two stormtroopers are notorious for being pains among the Imperial Army. Darth Vader needs test subjects for a new method of keeping stormtroopers in line. He finds his perfect targets in the most unruly, mischievous and outright impractical stormtroopers there ever were.
Relationships: Darth Vader/Original Male Character(s), Stormtrooper Character(s)/Darth Vader
Series: Rare Pairings [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/831537
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6





	1. Targets

“Lord Vader, your excellency,” Grand Admiral Tarkin greeted in the meeting room. He and several other officials were gathered around a table as Darth Vader took his stance at the head of it. 

“What are the reports for the Death Star’s occupants, power reserves and functions, and what is our status overall?” 

Tarkin huffed, “To the point I see. Well, the Death Star is at full capacity, the weapon works perfect, power is no problem at all and stable. There are over 400,000 stormtroopers and counting aboard and practically all are perfecting their duties accordingly. And soldier morale is-” 

“‘ _Practically_ ’ is a very interesting word choice, Admiral. So how are _practically_ all of our troops performing well?” The edge in Vader’s voice made everyone in the room stiffen. 

“Err, well we have a few troops who either aren’t doing their tasks which we’ve punished them already or we have a few who do their jobs but seem to use their breaks and other times off doing silly pranks as entertainment. We think we know who they are but we don’t have any evidence against them. Now as I recall-” 

“These troops, pranksters, they have bested you? You can find the most unworthy, cheating stormtroopers in the Death Star but you can’t catch pranksters?” Vader all but snarled. 

“They are very sly and calculative minds and have outmaneuvered all attempts at punishment. But really, their pranks aren’t counterproductive at all. They just come and go. They are at least pranking at non important times and they know when there’s a job to do, they do it. I give them credit for being creative and they do use lethal versions of their pranks in battle which has aided us significantly.” 

Darth Vader hissed, “That is still insolence that should be punished.” 

“Yes, but with the Rebel attacks increasing, we’ve set aside searching the entire Death Star for them to focus mainly on battle strategies. Unless of course, you wish to investigate, Lord Vader, then I’ll happily follow your lead,” Tarkin grinned. 

The larger imposing Sith Lord breathed and nodded, “Very well, so tell me Admiral. Who was it you suspected these pranksters were?” 

“TK-689 and MC-613, who are said to go by “Jaxen” after his home land on Jakku and “Taurus” after the star constellation seen from Coruscant, are bunk mates and best friends. Although we have never captured visual proof of their involvement, they have demonstrated crafty mobility I wouldn’t assume anyone less of dedicated chaos-bringers to have.” 

“Sounds like they’ve been let loose for long enough. I think it’s time to reel them in with shiny new collars, don’t you think? They sound like perfect test subjects for something I wish to try,” the Sith Lord spoke with a tone that made Tarkin shiver. 

“What…do you wish to try?” 

“I’ve always found it fascinating that a crime lord slug could hold power by just keeping a few of his subjects as slaves and examples yet no one dared to question him. With independence from the stormtroopers growing through doubt, I think an example must be made and now that I have the epitome of stormtrooper disloyalty in my grasp, they will both be my new slaves to dissuade this rising mutiny.” 

Tarkin and the others exchanged glances before another officer spoke up, “So you wish for us to turn two of the most effective though troublesome troopers into pleasure slaves to force an example of them?” 

“Well, I didn’t exactly envision pleasure as their ulterior use but now that I think about it, it wouldn’t be…undesirable. Tell me, Admiral, do you have any identification files of them with you. I would like to see their faces,” Darth Vader lowly growled with something hidden with it Tarkin couldn’t make out. 

“Err, y-yes, I have the data files right here.” Activating them, the room went darker as both Jaxen and Taurus’ files appeared with mugshots. 

Vader leaned on the table as he studied them. TK-689 aka “Jaxen” had jet black hair and gorgeous green eyes with a smugness in his profile picture that made Vader smirk beneath his armored helm. He was definitely a stubborn elitist and from what his profile indicated, he was also a master engineer and technician but used his talents on pranks instead of other things he could have been doing. It reminded Vader somewhat of himself when he was a young boy, the memory however was pushed aside when he then changed his view. 

MC-613 aka “Taurus” wasn’t as refined in his mugshot as Jaxen was. His holofeed facing forward had him flipping off the scanner and his side profile had him making a taunting gesture. Dirty blonde hair and pretty dark blue eyes didn’t hide the man he really was, a weapons expert and excellent fighter. He was apparently responsible for several mess hall brawls, outsmarting them all to get a free show, and one of the lead punishers of bad men, whipping them into shape so easily despite his hypocritical chaos-making. He was a handsome soldier and even Darth Vader wouldn’t have thought he was that crazy had he not seen his profile. 

Two different people combining their talents to create chaos upon the Death Star in such indescribable and incredible acts that no other person could do, fascinating. There were certainly props to give to such handsome and intelligent stormtroopers who were only numbers to the higher ups. But that would change. 

Darth Vader purred, “These two will be perfect.” 

“When should we prepare your…slaves?” 

“I’ll get them myself. They will probably try to outsmart me when they realize what I want but I want them to. I want to see what they can do, if they are as talented as you say. It will make breaking them so much more fun.” 

\-------------------------------------- 

Life as an Imperial stormtrooper was either boring or very dangerous and at some point in time, TK-689 found he couldn’t complain. He had been trained young and indifferent to the life itself. Some could say he was born to do it. There were times though he wished he could be more than just a soldier at the expense of a universally hated Empire that he himself varied on agreement with. 

“Jaxen, you want to go prank some of the rookies?” Spoke a trusted voice. 

Jaxen was indeed his name though to everyone else, he was just a number. Names were mainly for friends and what little family you had. MC-613, or as he called him “Taurus” for his stubbornness, was his best friend and bunk roommate. 

Together, they could get away with murder and were the elite pranksters of the Stormtrooper Corps. The problem with that of course was once everyone knew it was them with the pranks, they pretty much were preyed upon by officers that wanted to punish them. The problem for those officers however is in order to punish stormtroopers, you needed evidence unless they were Darth Vader and the Emperor, and let’s just say both he and Taurus had yet to get caught physically to the officers’ ire. 

Jaxen had his helmet on the table and stroked a gloved hand through his hair. He smiled, “You know, Vader just came aboard the Death Star less than an hour ago. If we do something like that, we may not live to tomorrow.” 

Taurus’ helmet was set aside and he scratched his own head almost like a mockery to Jaxen’s gesture. He sarcastically replied, “Oh no, what a nightmare! And I so wanted to see a rookie fight happen. They are always so entertaining.” 

The other met with a disappointed look. “I am not dying for you.” 

“Scared?” 

“I’m NOT scared, I just don’t want to make a fool of myself in front of Lord Vader is all. Later when he’s gone, we’ll torture the newbies with the paint splatter-makers.” 

Taurus snorted, “Vader is planning to be here for several weeks unless something comes up and I feel like I’ll die in those weeks not creating some sort for chaos!” 

“Always the drama queen, aren’t you?” Jaxen shook his head and sighed, “Alright, one prank and then we wait until there’s another opportunity without a chance of death by Vader.” 

“Yes!” 

“But I get to plan it.” 

“Gods damn it all.” 

What was planned to be only fifteen minutes turned into an hour later, and both Jaxen and Taurus were able to set up the perfect booby trap for the rookie stormtroopers who were preparing to depart from the briefing room. Ten gallons of red paint normally used for starships were transferred into splatter-makers, floating automatic-sealing balloons usually designed for distress flares Jaxen had rewired to drop anything he wanted. Ten splatter-makers, ten galloons, and ten times the mess. 

He controlled them into two rows of five right above the doors. If his calculations were correct, twenty new troopers were in there and the splatter-makers had a lot of spewing range so two troopers should do it per gallon. While he tinkered with the mechanics of the balloons, Taurus kept watch due to being more of a physical prankster than a tech one. 

They both hid in a balcony above the area and when the doors sounded open, Taurus held up a hand and began counting down with his fingers as four rows of five trooper marched out. As soon as his last finger fled into a fist, he ducked behind the wall as Jaxen pressed the button. 

A symphony of cries and paint hitting everything below was music to their ears. Apparently they also managed to hit an officer in the back too due to the immediate outcry of orders. Jaxen and Taurus tried desperately not to laugh out loud and had one of the balloons that had a hidden holofeed on it snap stills of the painting massacre and send it to Taurus’ private data pad for safe keeping. Turning off the balloons, they ran off and put their helmets back on to blend in with the plethora of stormtroopers patrolling. 

“That was sick! Did you hear the Lieutenant cursing?!” Taurus exclaimed. 

“Keep your voice down! Yeah, heh, I wonder if we’ll get another briefing tomorrow over regulations again.” 

“I don’t know, man, but I’m keeping that memory to my grave.” 

Jaxen frowned, “Do you think Lord Vader would be at the briefing this time though? What are the chances we’ll get caught?” 

“Don’t worry, bro, we’ll be a-okay. If anything, Vader will just enforce a few more codes and that’ll be it.” 

“So what happens when one of us is caught but not the other?” 

Taurus scoffed as he turned down a different hall towards their barracks before jokingly retorting, “If I get caught I know you’ll take the fall for me which is why you are my best friend.” 

“Great, now why are you mine again?” Jaxen spat back with some humor. It was enough to make Taurus stop in his tracks and frown. 

“Oh come on, you know you love me!” 

The next day there were whispers about the incident, how the “Pranktroopers” struck again. And like Jaxen called it, a briefing in a hangar was called. As all the troopers lined up, he and Taurus were stuck up front. He had an unusually bad feeling that someone was watching the both of them, especially him. 

“Attention!” 

The stomp of thousands of feet at once from all the troopers rang out and reverberated into a dark beat. In front of the entire company, Grand Admiral Tarkin paced between the large gaps of troopers facing him in rows upon rows of conformity. 

“It has come to our attention that although productivity is high, there are a few renegades among us who like to stir up trouble. Thankfully this nonsense has not caused us any casualties, no setbacks, or other abysmal actions but regardless of intentions, this is inappropriate for an elite corps like the Imperial Army.” 

As Tarkin continued to shame them and to their utter amusement, Jaxen and Taurus gave a slight glance at one another, making sure it wasn’t noticeable to oust them. However, Jaxen noticed in the corner of his peripheral vision with the helmet, Darth Vader was standing at the very end of the gap and he was scanning the troops until he somehow made eye contact with him despite Jaxen staring straight forward. The stare didn’t falter for over ten seconds. 

A voice in the back of his head told him he knew. For once, Jaxen was in fact scared but alerted that Vader didn’t seem to be doing anything about it. Whether or not Taurus felt the same or saw too was unknown to him. If Vader did know it was them, why wasn’t he force choking them or approaching? After another seemingly long wait, Darth Vader finally broke eye contact with him and scanned the remainder of the troops. This wasn’t good. 

“Now, Lord Vader, have you anything to say in this matter?” 

Jaxen’s reality snapped back and he watched the ever intimidating dark lord step forward until he was in the middle of the hangar. The breathing of the man behind the mask did little to calm his nerves. 

“Yes I do. To these ‘Pranktroopers’ I have to say that although your efforts of chaos have served us well under abnormal conditions, I will still deal harshly with any one of you who risks the order of this army. I will be coming for you if you try again under my rule,” Vader rumbled. 

When Darth Vader made eye contact once more with Jaxen, the latter cringed inwardly and nearly shivered as he felt a dark presence enter his mind. He wasn’t dying but something was warning him and he couldn’t pinpoint what emotion he was feeling through it. As soon as it came though, it vanished with the twirl of Vader’s cape as the Sith Lord walked away. 

“Dismissed!” 

\---------------------------------------- 

The remainder of the day seemed to pass like a blur as he and Taurus sat on their stiff beds. Taurus looked just as anxious as he did. 

“So did you feel-?” 

“Yeah-yeah, I…I certainly did.” 

Jaxen peered around the room before making a click of the tongue, “So what now? He obviously knows.” 

“No shit he knows,” Taurus snarled. “You know what we can do? On the next ship heading out with stormtroopers, we sneak aboard and head off to whatever planet they send us to and just go help them do whatever they want us to do.” 

“What do you mean? You’re the one who wanted to do the prank; you should be the one who goes there because it’s not my fault.” 

“You’re my accomplice, genius! He’ll punish both of us regardless of who’s idea was it!” 

Jaxen rubbed his temples angrily, “Okay alright fine, we’ll figure something out at 06:00 tomorrow okay. Let’s just get some rest and we’ll debate about this later alright? Alright good.” 

And with that, the man took off his remaining armor and set it aside to rest in his blacks facing the wall. Taurus glanced at him but acknowledged how right he was. They needed to rest. Following suit after one hell of a day, he went to sleep. 

The time seemed to creep slower than normal for Taurus and he couldn’t comprehend why. When he was truly out, the black of his vision faded into a weird room tinted red. Was he still on the Death Star? He got up from the bed and looking around for Jaxen. He definitely wasn’t where he wanted to be. 

“What the hell?! Can’t even go to sleep without some weird voodoo bullshit happening up in here?” 

“How is it you two have been untraceable until now? I knew it was you the moment I saw you. Humor plagued your minds like a beacon. But then again, that’s what happens when there are no Force sensitive people on this Death Star other than me.” 

The blonde all but whipped around hard enough to crack his neck. He nearly ran into Darth Vader’s lingering form staring menacingly down at him. His nose barely touched the upper chest armor of the larger man. 

Taurus quickly tried to come up with an answer to that. “I-we just like to keep ourselves entertained, Lord Vader. There isn’t much to do on this Death Star as one would think. Together, our minds just come up with awesome tactics that can be transitioned from pranks to battle. Of course, we have to test out our pranks so when we do use them on the front lines, they work properly.” 

That wasn’t a complete lie. They more than often did test run their ingenuity on the inhabitants of the Death Star to see if they worked on a non-lethal degree before commuting them into actual weapons. But they also did pranks just for fun upon occasion. 

Then suddenly, Darth Vader chuckled darkly, “I have to say, the plans I’ve been briefed with regarding you two have been quite impressive. But I am still a man of my word when I said you will be punished for your unruly behavior.” 

“Ah, wait, are you inside my mind?” 

“Yes, through the Force. I could kill you right now if I actually tried. Would you like to see?” 

Taurus broadly stood up for himself, “No! No, no, I got it. Don’t get all magic killer on me. I get it, I got it. I got the concept. So now what, we just talk or what? I don’t appreciate someone invading my mind, bro.” 

The cockiness Taurus produced was quite entertaining to Darth Vader. Normally, he would have killed such insubordinate troopers for mouthing off to him but he found it amusing for his new slave. It was going to be fun watching this one submit to his whim. 

Darth Vader began to circle him like a predator. “This ‘Jaxen’ is your partner in crime?” 

“Yeah, why?” 

“While I’m talking to you, I’m also in his mind right now. I just threatened to kill you for your smart mouth but it seems he is so willing to sacrifice himself in your place. Have you ever known that he is willing to verse me to save you?” 

Taurus frowned, “You’re lying. You’re just saying that to get to me. He’s in no real danger and neither am I. This is just a dream!” 

Vader now dwarfed him with a snarl, “Oh I assure you, this is real. Right now, Jaxen is submitting to me to save your life. Would you do the same for him?” 

“O-of course,” the stormtrooper sighed. “Just don’t hurt him. He doesn’t deserve it. It was me who egged him to do the prank yesterday though he warned me you were on board and that it was a bad idea. I just wanted to have some fun. Please, do anything you want to me, not him.” 

Darth Vader seemed to be thinking because Taurus could’ve swore there was a swell in the taller man’s pride. “How far are you willing to go for him? If you value him as much as you say, you’ll get on your knees right now.” 

Taurus stood his ground like his namesake and Vader almost lost his composure to force the soldier down and take him for pleasure as his officer suggested. He wanted to make them his and Taurus held a fire he was more than happy to fight. It made him feel young again in every aspect. Anakin Skywalker would have loved these two as he did now. 

“Now,” he commanded, hiding his aroused state of mind. 

Staring at him defiantly, Taurus sank to his knees and scowled, “Fine, now what, _Master_?” 

Vader nearly choked back a rumble on that last word spoken. He was surprised to hear it from such a rebellious stormtrooper but he accepted it fast. “Let’s see if we can put that temperate mouth to better use.” 

\-------------------------------------- 

Jaxen awoke with a startle as he heard someone call his name. But when he did, it became obvious he was not in the quarters he shared with Taurus. He was…somewhere. 

“Taurus? Come on, this isn’t funny! Taurus!” 

“You won’t find him here. Interesting how you two are said to be inseparable yet here you are. An entire mind away from your best friend and stuck in here with me.” 

Jaxen didn’t search for the voice. He knew who it was and calmly stood up and turned to the large black figure he knew as Darth Vader. “I had heard the Force could invade minds, didn’t think I would see you here of all places.” 

“You’re much wiser than Taurus. He’s been foolishly fighting me as I tried to explain myself to him,” Darth Vader spoke as he approached the stormtrooper. 

Jaxen held a sultry grin and kept his arms crossed, something that Vader was finding quite suiting. He knew he was going to have to watch his back with Jaxen. Although Taurus was temperamental and a fighter, Jaxen was calculative and calm. They always say beware the calm ones and Vader knew better than to think otherwise in this case. 

“Yeah?” 

“He would do anything for you, did you know that? I threatened your life and he submitted to me. Now I wonder if you’ll do the same if I threaten to kill him for your loyalty to me,” Vader purred. 

“You’re bluffing,” Jaxen called out. “You don’t want us dead because you want something from us. Can’t get it with corpses. So let me guess, you’re in my mind and also in his with the Force, you’re trying to trap us into a lawful agreement in which while you say you’re threatening us, you are actually using us to get to each other for undying loyalty despite no actual danger…kind of like killing two birds with one stone except the endgame is we’ll be no longer able to use our pranks and this is a scare tactic to sharpen us up. Is that it? You could’ve just ordered us to stop instead of going the extra mile but I’ll give you kudos for dedication to your powers.” 

Darth Vader stood in silence. He should have predicted Jaxen would oust him being as cunning as he was. He then smirked inwardly, “Perhaps, but since you seem so sure…” 

A portal opened with a mirror image of Vader and Taurus on the other side. To Jaxen’s horror, Taurus was being choked to death, turning a sickening color in the face. 

“Stop. You can’t do this.” 

That bravado and calmness was slowly breaking at the sight of his best friend being tortured. Vader all but cocked his head, “Really? And what are you going to do to stop me? The Force can also link minds and right now, Taurus is dying for you. Too bad you can’t save him. Very disappointing.” 

Jaxen stared at Taurus until he spoke with a quivering voice, “Please…stop! Take me instead!” 

Just as Vader predicted, all that bravado was gone. Now he was doing exactly what Vader wanted and what he ironically predicted himself. Jaxen was beginning to go stir crazy seeing Taurus lying at the feet of Darth Vader’s mirror. 

“So if you are willing to sacrifice yourself for your friend, how far will you go?” 

Jaxen looked at him with hatred deep inside but tried to hide it, not realizing they were both inside his mind and couldn’t hide any emotions from the Sith Lord. He growled, “As far as it takes to keep him safe, Lord Vader.” 

“Good,” Vader laughed. “Now get on the bed again. I have need of some…services I hope you could provide for me.” 

Jaxen glanced from him to the bed with major skepticism and slowly made his way back. Sitting down, he never took his eyes off Vader for a second. “So, what exactly do you need?” 

In a flash, Darth Vader was leaning over him, hands placed next to his head. The larger man had his crotch armor pressed on top of Jaxen’s groin and the latter shuttered when he could do nothing but stare into lifeless, red tinted glass. 

“You.” 

A dark chuckle was all he could hear as his vision began to blur then suddenly, everything went white and he shot up to find himself back in his quarters panting heavily. He didn’t buy it. Scouting the room for anything abnormal or _him_ , he found nothing except Taurus face down, twitching and drooling. He was making an odd clasping and releasing motion with his free hand not tucked under a pillow. 

“Taurus, wake up!” 

When his partner didn’t awake in the bed across, he scowled and jumped out to grab him by the shoulders and shake him. The guy jolted up and realizing he was drooling quickly brushed off the pool of saliva with one of the sheets disgusted. 

Taurus stared with a snarl, “You break my neck, I’m haunting you until you die so I can beat the shit out of you for all eternity.” 

“Taurus, I just had the most insane dream! Lord Vader made me see things, you died and-!” 

“Whoa, whoa, hang on! You…saw…Lord Vader? No, I saw Lord Vader; the guy said you gave your life to save me and I saved you and I knew it was just a dream, I should’ve kicked his metal-clad ass to kingdom come for making me live through that!” 

Jaxen paused, “Same…and then he told me- ” 

“-He was simultaneously in your mind talking to you the same as he was talking to me. That sly bastard.” 

Both of them looked between horrified and intrigued. 

Jaxen knelt beside the bed and smirked, “So he really was there…in our minds. You want to know something scary? He said he wanted me and used you so I would submit and was about to molest me before I woke up I think.” 

Taurus’ face dropped which made Jaxen wonder if he said something wrong. “Are you fucking kidding me? You almost get molested and wake up, I have to give the guy a blowjob and mid-intimacy, you wake me up?” 

“Do you thin-wait, you had to give Darth Vader in a dream realm a blowjob?” 

Sitting completely up now and furious, Taurus exclaimed, “Well it wasn’t by choice! The taste was odd too.” 

“I-I don’t need to know that part. But what I’m now deducing is that he really did visit our minds in slumber with the Force and apparently, he wants to use us as punishment for our pranks. He’s planning on making an example of us in front of the entire Stormtrooper Corps by breaking our minds. I assume he hasn’t had much company for as long as he’s been in that suit so now he sees our antics as the perfect opportunity to take what he wants by using the most troublesome stormtroopers on the Death Star to his every whim…including sexual repression it seems. You get what I’m saying?” 

Turning to Taurus, he was met with a dumbfounded look and a furrow of mixed expressional brows. “No.” 

“Okay in plain Basic, he’s punishing us by making us his sex slaves or at least that’s what he plans to do.” 

“You came up with that on the fly? Two different dreams of sexual encounters with Lord Vader and you come up with that? You should be a detective, you’d make banks, dude!” 

“ _Linked_ sexual encounters and if you have a better idea then let’s hear it.” 

The blonde stormtrooper hummed in thought before speaking again, “What if…it’s a test? What if Lord Vader is just screwing with us to scare us out of pranks and his intentions are just played on fears of him?” 

“Your fear is sucking Vader’s dick?” Said Jaxen deadpanned. 

“Hhhrrrnnmmm. I’m beginning to like your theory better. So what are we going to do? It’s not like we can leave now that he has access to our minds and, oh I don’t know, knows where we sleep,” Taurus gestured with a scowl. 

Jaxen stood up and grabbed his stormtrooper helmet, watching his reflection shift and change over the curve of the white. “Well, no matter what, he can’t take our individuality. If he wants to tame us, guess he’s going to have to try harder than that. Taurus, you want to cause some chaos today?” 

Seeing Taurus’ face light up like a kid given a bucket of candy was the highlight of the discovery that they were being stalked by the most ruthless Force-wielding being in the galaxy. Why not make it hell on the way to their doom?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just like the idea of Vader taking his subordinates, don't @ me


	2. Pranktroopers vs Darth Vader

In full attire, Jaxen and Taurus patrolled the halls of the upper Death Star communication areas. It was quite boring…but not for long.

"Ow!"

"What the hell!?"

"Damn it!"

Cries of disappointment, slight pain, and funnily enough various curses made Jaxen and Taurus scarce in one area as they muffled their laughter, moving as quickly as they could before slowing back to a normal pace some several kilometers away.

"And that's how it is done," Taurus said as he cockily did a taunting brush off gesture.

Jaxen shook his head, "How did no one see you put down putty bombs on the floor."

"I'm a boss, never doubt me, bro." The blonde stormtrooper did a little dance in victory.

"You think that'll get his attention?"

"Got theirs, didn't it?" Chuckled Taurus.

Unbeknownst to the two, a DRK-1 Dark Eye Probe droid lingered far above them and watched.

\-----------------------

_"Got theirs, didn't it?"_

Black gloved fingers tapped crossed arms as Tarkin on the side smirked, "We finally got them. How did you know they were going to do pranks in this section?"

Heavy breathing with a hint of amusement was not lost to him. "They were assigned here. I had their superior give me their schedule for the week so I thought about the opportunities they had to do their pranks and figured why not monitor them the entire week? They were bound to do something sooner or later. They just don't learn their lessons, do they?"

"I imagine not. Do you want them brought here?"

"No, it's time I made my appearance in person."

Before Darth Vader could turn away, Tarkin immediately spoke up, "Careful, Lord Vader, they aren't easy to corner as their peers have learned. They may have pranks at their disposal on their person and if they don't, they'll give you a run for your credits. We learned that at the Battle of Denash."

"I remember that. I heard there was a massive brawl between the ranks. How were they a part of it?"

"Well you aren't the first to go after them for _certain_ reasons. A company that served in battle wanted some rewards for their service. They decided to go after those two and three other troopers they dubbed the 'pretty boys.' They tried to woo them and when push came to shove, MC-613 started throwing punches and TK-689 followed suit. They won using their brains mainly though the one called 'Taurus' was a brute, plowing through them like they were dirt in a crop field. Taurus is going to be your physical hardship, but 'Jaxen' is going to be your mental one. Together, they'll do some damage if you're not careful."

Vader made a scoffing noise. "Don't worry, Admiral, I am sure I can handle them."

Tarkin bowed and smiled, "Of course, sir."

The Sith Lord fled the room immediately with a fast stride towards the Pranktroopers' known location.

\-------------------

"So you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Yeah…no," Jaxen crassly smiled beneath the helmet.

"I'm thinking since we're on duty in weapons training tomorrow, we rig those rocket launchers to instead fire paint backwards into the crowd. As far as I know, it can't hurt anybody," Taurus laughed.

"Yes, paint flying at a hundred and fifty meters per second, that's definitely not a risk."

Unaware, a black form dipped just right behind them and strolled in pace nearly touching their backs with the panel of the suit.

"I'm trying, don't worry. I'll have the kinks of it worked out by morning. I'm efficient."

"Now that is something I would love to know, just how _efficient_ you really are."

Both of them stopped abruptly letting the figure behind them bump into their backs. They dared not to look back or even move for that matter. Taurus was wide-eyed underneath his helmet.

"Ohhh nooo." He attempted to whisper but failed miserably.

Jaxen was dead silent until he felt a hand mess with the back of his belt before dipping lower to the curve of his armor covering his rear. He let out a small squeak when that hand went a bit farther than he expected.

"So nice to see you two again in real life. I'll admit I've become quite a fan of your antics," Darth Vader breathed.

Taurus lowered his helmet an inch blushing underneath before turning to Vader with a surprised voice, "You are? Ow!"

Jaxen instantly slapped him upside the head and shook his own as Vader briefly let out what sounded to them as a genuine laugh, something they were both horrified but interested to hear.

"I wonder what you two would look like against one another, putting on a show for me and my officers. If I let you play in my quarters, I would expect some feisty entertainment, the same type of attitude you give torturing your peers with pranks though I would think that energy could be reserved for more pleasurable activities I have in store for you," Vader all but purred in their ears.

Jaxen and Taurus exchanged glances before nodding and the latter held out a steel ball, "Hey Lord Vader, can you hold this for one second."

Before the taller man could say anything, Taurus threw the ball down and after one bounce, it activated and sent various colors of smoke throughout the hall making even one foot of vision hard to see. Both stormtroopers bolted the scene with Vader swiping the mist away from staining his helmet's eyesight behind them as they rounded a corner out of sight.

"You cannot run from me!"

Still running, Jaxen yelled out, "What was that? Vader really is obsessed with us! I called it, you owe me some spice!"

"Can we not talk about that and focus on-!" Taurus gestured madly behind him.

Although Darth Vader wasn't seen, they knew they couldn't keep running for some time. They would probably have to run around the entire Death Star before they could lose him.

Jaxen panted, "Okay, so Vader is on our asses-!"

"More like he wants to ride ours literally but go on!"

"And he wants to make us sex slaves-!"

"Yeah?"

"My body ain't ready for that shit and I have no plans on doing that!"

"Point being?"

"Umm, unless we can stop hi-oh shit!"

Darth Vader was suddenly in front of them at the end of the hall they just entered and both slid to a halt before running back where they came from, altering the route back to the nearest hangar.

"Where will you run to?" Vader spoke hoarsely, walking with fast broad steps.

"Not you," Jaxen huffed under his breath.

They both dipped into hangar A113 and to their surprise, several groups of stormtroopers were marching. There were four lines of two rows and both runaways immediately got behind one marching squad, calming themselves as much as possible when Vader entered just in the nick of time.

Darth Vader looked around confused from their point of view. With too much movement and too many bodies on top of that, it was probably hard for him to pinpoint an exact match to them using the Force though it was only a matter of time.

They marched with the group across the hangar, intercepting with another squad as Darth Vader searched for them. Thankfully, he was closing in on another squadron instead of theirs so when they marched next to an exit and checked to see if Vader was looking at them or not, they slipped into the other hall and ran down it to their quarters which took roughly an hour to get to. They were grateful they somehow lost their pursuer.

Running inside and locking the door, Jaxen threw off his helmet and fell onto his bed beaten while Taurus pressed his back against the door and slid down stunned and out of breath. They both didn't move for over fifteen minutes.

"Oh my god, we are so dead," Taurus muttered, "We just turned down Darth fucking Vader and now we ran from him, defying him. Either he's going to straight up murder us, or we're going to get raped and then murdered."

"Please don't say that. Look, we need to come up with new plans of escape, how to distract him-has that ceiling vent always been there?" Jaxen pointed with a slightly confused tone as he still lied panting from lack of oxygen.

Taurus then began to laugh, making his friend turn his head towards him but refused to sit up from the bed. "What's so funny about nearly getting killed or raped?"

"Did you hear what he said? 'I wonder what you two would look like together putting on a show.' He wants us to fuck each other while he watches like a pervert. I don't know about you but being friends would make that so awkward. I can't imagine doing that with you," he chuckled, wiping sweat from his forehead.

Jaxen grunted in pain as he sat up and turned towards Taurus with a neutral expression. "Well, have you ever felt any attraction towards me since we've met?"

"A little bit but you're a handsome dude, it's bound for even the closest friend to admit you are pleasing to the eye. Like I said though, we're best friends. That can make everything worse in friendship by sleeping with your partner because making eye contact would be the hardest thing in the world after that. Too much tension on the job, a lot of unresolved problems from it. I…don't want to risk what we already have."

The other stormtrooper nodded, "I understand that. They say you should always try everything once though. They also say that what may destroy a friendship also has the potential to make it grow more than it ever did before. So with that and me also liking you maybe in more ways than one, my question to you is would you like to try something we've never done before?"

Taurus peered at the ground, straining his teeth together in thought. It was a risk but it also had potential. With a sexually-deprived Darth Vader stalking them now, there really wasn't much to lose per say except their friendship.

"If I agree, what will become of us?"

There was a silent pause between the two before Jaxen slowly shook his head, "I don't know. It's just a leap of faith right now. But if it works, I've heard from one of my friends back home that in marriage, your partner basically becomes your best friend too. It may not be any different than what we've already have, just some extra feelings on the side."

With an uncertain huff, Taurus stood and sat next to him. "Alright, if you wish to try this, I'll go down with you."

It was awkward at first with both of them trying to figure out how they were going to go about this. Taurus though was the one who took initiative and carefully pressed his lips against Jaxen's. Making sure he didn't overstep, he waited for Jaxen to become accepting of it and move on his own accord which he surprisingly did. The idea that he was making out with his best friend was uncomfortable but the kiss itself wasn't bad at all. He began to grin against Jaxen's mouth as he sped up his assault that earned him a moan.

Jaxen, on the other hand, was enjoying it without second doubts. He liked it a bit more than he should have. So this was what it was like. When he felt Taurus break resolve and get more aggressive, he couldn't help but make a small noise and smile back.

For a minute they explored each other, even physically running their hands across each other's armor and faces. When they broke off, Taurus was much more confident and Jaxen was stunned how good it was. Then Taurus peered down to the side kind of awkwardly but still smiling.

"So."

"So?"

"Did you…like it?" Taurus asked shyly.

Jaxen nodded, pursing his lips to remember the feeling. "Yeah, yeah, that was actually a stress relief if I've ever had one. I didn't expect you to start it first but thank you."

Taurus was about to say something when they heard rhythmed breathing start and grow closer to the door. Their faces dropped in horror as they recognized the famous sound.

"We have to get out of here," Jaxen whispered. "The ceiling vent!"

Both looked up at the vent with its sealed grate and both then looked at each other, smiling wickedly. Jaxen ducked down off and under the bed to drag back a toolkit he used to tinker with his devices and inventions late after a shift. Finding a screwdriver, he climbed up the side shelf of his bed to the ceiling vent and began to unscrew it loose.

Immediately, banging on the door and the sound of various buttons being pushed made both of them freeze. "Why do you keep running, just give in to me."

"Hurry!" Taurus silently exclaimed.

As soon as the last screw fell, Jaxen caught the vent and threw it on the bed before signaling Taurus to follow. Right when Jaxen was about to enter it, a red lightsaber broke through the edge of the door and slowly started rising with the doorframe and following it all the way around.

Jaxen climbed into the vent and semi-laid in the tight space once he gave enough room for Taurus to get it. Taurus' head popped up looking left to right before going with the latter upon seeing his partner waiting for him.

"Go! I'll follow!" He announced as forced himself into the cramped ventilation duct.

Jaxen nodded once he was completely in with him and began crawling. Somewhere behind them, he could hear their door being pushed over with a thud that reverberated off the walls. Not stopping, he made sure Taurus was following as he continued on.

"That was close," Jaxen sighed.

"Yeah but now what are we going to do? Our room is probably trashed, we left our helmets so we have no way to blend in, and we have nowhere to go."

"You still have an assigned TIE Fighter under your use, right?"

Taurus smirked, "Yes I do, but we can't leave in it unless authorized by an officer or…by Darth Vader himself."

"We can talk to an officer, can't we?"

"No, TIE Fighters are managed by officers but technically Grand Admiral Tarkin is in charge of all squadrons, uses, you can't wipe your ass on that thing unless he tells you to type authority. And you guessed it, he also talks to Lord Vader and at this point in time, I am one hundred percent sure he knows I have one."

"Doesn't leave us with much of a choice, does it?"

Jaxen crawled over another grate and peered down out of morbid curiosity. "Whoa-ho-ho, had I known this existed, I would have gone here instead of looking up porn on my jail-broken holopad."

Taurus raised a confused brow, "What do you-oh nice!"

Below them, it was apparent they were in the women's refresher because there were a lot of naked women and the angle their view was at was pleasant to look at indeed.

Jaxen laughed under his breath, "As nice as this is, we still need to keep going. If the vent leads to the women's showering area, you think it may also lead to the men's?"

"Why, you excited about that more than anything?" Taurus smirked as he gave a suggestive rise of the brows.

"We shall see, won't we?"

They crawled farther down and eventually as Jaxen predicted, there was a men's refresher area visible from the grate. Jaxen moved over it and carefully maneuvered himself around so both he and Taurus could peek.

"We couldn't be the only ones to discover this. There's no way. Getting hard over there, Taurus?"

"Hey man, I may like women more but I'm not hating what I'm seeing either. You make a gay joke, I laugh and say I think I can confirm now that I am bisexual so suck on that," Taurus amusingly chastised.

"That's fair and I do see your point. Not bad indeed, especially that one."

Jaxen pointed at a muscular man Vader's height, maybe larger. A brunette and a nice package to boot.

"Isn't he one of those special ops Shadow troopers? Matra? Metra? That's badass."

Jaxen laughed, "Come on, Taurus, we need to get to your Fighter craft. We can rest in it. Vader won't suspect us to be there."

They both crawled for almost thirty minutes until Jaxen saw a light to the side and checked it. "Which hangar is your craft in?"

"B178."

"This is B150."

"We can get out here and walk," Taurus mused.

Jaxen shook his head angrily, "But we don't have any helmets, stupid!"

"Then steal some. All hangars have spare guns and buckets. In case you come back from battle or something with yours damaged and you need a temporary one until you get yours repaired, they are there for that purpose. Of course, you're supposed to give them back after you get your new one but that doesn't always happen. Not uncommon for someone to just take them and never give them back."

"Okay fine, this is our stop."

Revealing the screwdriver he kept on his person, he unfastened the screws and pushed the vent out to the floor which was only a foot from the vent's placement. Both of them paused to stretch from the compression and the fact they had been on their knees for a while. Taurus then gestured to the far corner closet and when they got there, indeed there were spare helmets and weapons galore. Grabbing one each, they walked into the hall that led to the other hangars.

"How pissed do you think Lord Vader is right now?" Taurus asked, readjusting the snug helmet.

"I'd say on a scale of one to ten probably an eleven."

The TIE Fighter Taurus used was resting beside the left wall entering the B178 hangar. He activated the door and sat in it, twirling around in the seat as far as it would let him.

"Welcome to the Bullpen. As you can see she is an older lady with high velocity firepower, equipped with tracker missiles, heat seekers, and mini ion cannon. She is the most unique model and the most deadly out in this here wasteland that is Hangar B178."

Jaxen scoffed, "That's not unique."

"Don't hurt her feelings. I make her feel special and she, in return, gives me luck on the battlefield. And hey, I ain't dead yet," Taurus replied.

"So where are we supposed to sleep?"

The blonde trooper raised a finger but gently put it back down. "I…didn't think about that. We can't share the chair. In fact, we shouldn't be in here at all so the chair would be the absolute worst place to sleep without giving away our positions so I guess we'll sleep on the floor together."

Jaxen blinked as Taurus closed the TIE's main door, sealing them in. "Are you serious?"

"You have a better idea right now?"

"No," Jaxen sighed, placing his helmet on the ground. Taurus followed.

Slowly shaking his head, he sat down on the floor against the TIE's interior wall and crossed his legs to get into a comfortable position. Taurus joined right beside him. It certainly wasn't the option Jaxen preferred but he could settle with it. Slowly, he began to drift into sleep and Taurus must have followed when the faint sound of light snoring made him smirk. He found himself leaning against his friend's shoulder as a makeshift pillow and Taurus was half against the wall, half against his head not that he really minded.

They were fugitives so to speak. The only other bed they were probably going to have was wherever Vader wanted to put them as his slaves. A cold metal floor was better than nothing.

\-------------------

Many shifts from that day forward on and off the clock were horrendous to put it mildly. With Darth Vader on their tails, they did everything in their power to stop him. Whenever they lured him with taunts and obscene gestures, he would follow and the results were pranks and more pranks. Everything from being covered in red paint from a rigged mouse droid to their more lethal "bomb voyage" technique happened but seeing Vader still striding through the smoldering remains of the latter made them freak out.

The paint mouse droid prank though was pretty funny. Hijacking a mouse droid and filling it with red paint with a specialized bomb was easy, navigating the programmed droid to drive towards Vader and explode with proximity was hard. The end result had Vader try and pick up the droid and a coat of red paint covered almost every inch of that man. Seeing Vader wipe away the paint and stand there stunned was totally worth the disappointment several officers tried to show at them.

It was them verses Darth Vader and they could tell their peers knew about it. A campaign between stormtroopers began and bets were high on how long this war would go before they were caught. So far, they actually had more supporters than Lord Vader and more tallies to their name in successes.

The higher officers weren't as happy about it and attempted to aid their opponent more so. Let's just say, there were a lot of broken and missing probe droids. The missing ones were reprogrammed accordingly courtesy of Jaxen and spying on Vader gave them an advantage. Sometimes though, they would lose a droid or two to him or one of his stupid stick-wielding guards.

Sometimes though if they ran out of tactics, hiding was a common strategy too. If they saw Vader's shadow, they would hightail themselves out of the area. If they found themselves seen under any circumstances, the chase began and so far they were doing a good job of avoiding capture though he came relatively close before in the TIE Fighter barracks.

When they found themselves on the same Star Destroyer as him, things got a little complicated. Watching Darth Vader run was…scary to say the least. The fact that he was keeping pace was astonishing. Of course, he seemed to have lost steam at some point because he began walking menacingly once more despite they were still going.

"Can you please go die in a fire!"

"Probably not the best thing to say to him right now," Jaxen snarled.

"Probably don't care," Taurus retorted.

"I just realized, why isn't he using the Force to just choke us midair or anything?"

"He wants us to give in willingly. He's going to do this until we submit, tormenting us with his presence until we end up a slave or we die!"

Entering the bridge and realizing it was dead end, they quickly looked at each other before looking around to find two slots near the elevator they could fit into for cover. With the Star Destroyer preparing to dock with the Death Star, they only had to buy themselves time. Taurus threw something at Jaxen and he caught it, setting it right in front of the entry way they came from.

Hiding, they waited for their superior. The predator becomes prey and the prey become predators. The door finally opened and a black cape swayed quickly, passing them without even noticing them. At that moment, Jaxen activated a remote and the device lit up with only a second for Vader to look down and then look back at them suddenly sensing their eagerness.

The bridge lit up with a bright flash and all the two stormtroopers could see was a black blur fly back into the hall while they were pressed against the wall from the shockwave. When the light died, the whole bridge, probably along with Vader, was covered in a bluish-green transparent, sticky resin. Thankfully, the two had covered themselves at an angle to prevent getting coated themselves.

"So, that's what it feels like? I thought it only spewed resin, not launched everyone off their feet then coated them with resin," Taurus scolded.

"Told you I was still working on the discharge. You didn't let me test it first," Jaxen responded. "Let's go before he gets back up please!"

In agreement, they hit the elevator button and quickly crammed themselves in. Taurus furiously pressed the down button and it finally dinged in acknowledgement. As the doors closed however, Vader suddenly appeared on the bridge again peering quickly throughout the room before remembering where he saw them last only to see them in the elevator. He stomped towards them but the doors already sealed.

Taurus was still pressing frantically on it as some banging sounds were heard then a familiar lightsaber nearly pierced their helmets which made them scream and jump back. To their relief, the elevator began descending and the lightsaber flew up then disappeared.

They both just stood there, dead inside as elevator music played in the background. Taurus muttered after a few seconds of silence between them, "Do you think we should surrender?"

Their helmets tilted towards one another. "You know he's not going to stop and I don't know about you but I'm kind of wondering whether we're dodging him all for nothing. I mean sure the term 'sex slave' isn't appealing but we'd get pampered, we'll have a lot more fun, and by Vader's side who knows what we could get away with?"

"Or we could be bruised, beaten, stripped of our dignity and paraded around as failures for the entire Empire to see. And who knows, once we outlive our usefulness of whatever Vader so desires, we'll just be killed off."

"I'm still incredibly curious though. I want to know so badly whether it's good or bad don't you?"

"If you jinx us…"

When the elevator reached their destination, the doors opened and to their utter terror, there stood Darth Vader with his arms crossed and breathing heavily. Behind him, both of them could see the smoldering remains of a metal circle plate which came from a floor above with the current ceiling, several other stormtroopers armed and preventing their escape by surrounding the elevator, and even several officers including Admiral Tarkin was postured smugly with his hands clasped behind his back by Vader's side.

"I think you're about to have your wish come true," Jaxen mumbled miserably. When Taurus slowly lifted his arm to press the elevator button to go back up, Jaxen stopped him with his hand knowing they couldn't get out of this now and slowly made Taurus' arm sink back down.

Darth Vader still had his arms crossed and gave a gruff breath of triumph, "Well, you certainly put up a fight the past few weeks, I'll give you two that. But now there is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and certainly no prank of yours is going to save you. I win."

"Taurus, I fucking hate you sometimes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Darth Vader's on your ass, you've got nowhere to run boys! I had fun with this chapter without a doubt.


	3. No Shame in Defeat

Darth Vader had been much more eager than they anticipated to simply dragging them back with him to his chambers instead of listening to the Admiral rant about customs, privileges, and the “how you thought you could get away with it” speech. It lasted for what seemed to be forever and frankly, even Vader was looking around bored out of his mind and that was something never seen every day. Unfortunately, duty called to Vader so he had no choice but to hold his new slaves in his quarters for the time being. 

To the present, they were both sitting with their upper armor from their waist up removed entirely. Thankfully, their black undershirts were still on and their groin armor down was still intact. With restraint cuffs fusing their hands together, they could do nothing but wait. 

The room they were in was dark but had the structure of a normal Imperial set up with glowing buttons, wall bio lights, and the usual. They sat unwillingly on some sort of padding and in front of them; there was a duo of stormtroopers facing away on the outside of the room blocking the only believed exit. Behind them, there was what looked to be a throne. There were other open rooms behind the throne but they were dead ends to other questionable areas neither of them wanted to go near. If one had to guess, they were in Darth Vader’s personal quarters. 

Taurus had maneuvered himself into a crossed leg position and was playing with the cuffs to seek out a weakness to break free. Jaxen wasn’t as interested. He sat somewhat sideways, leaning against an upright pillow and simply meditated in a pseudo-sleep state. 

“You aren’t going to break them. They are tungsten carbonite encased with electromagnetic composites. You’d either have to be a Force user or incredibly strong to do anything.” 

“I can try.” 

Jaxen then laughed, “You always hated being confined. You’re a fighter alright. That’s what I always loved about you.” 

Taurus stopped tinkering with the cuffs and stared at him, “Really? So does that mean you forgive me for jinxing us into this mess?” 

“No,” Jaxen shook his head, keeping a smile. “You are an asshole…but you’re also my asshole so I guess I have to forgive you at some point, right?” 

A snap of metal and a following gasp was heard which confused Jaxen at first until he looked over at Taurus who was incredibly gleeful for someone restrained…until it became apparent he wasn’t anymore. The cuffs had broken after minutes of Taurus low key fighting with them. 

He still held the most childish smile as he glanced back at Jaxen. 

“No you didn’t,” Jaxen narrowed his eyes in disbelief. 

Taurus held out his wrists, now apart from each other with a silent squeal of delight. 

“No you didn’t.” 

He double checked Taurus’ cuffs to see if he was hallucinating. Sure enough, their electromagnetic components were sparking, trying to regain their lure and the metal pressing just below the palms were damaged. 

Jaxen slouched with a half-angry but also impressed expression. “Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell, dude?” 

“I used the floor to press down and forced my hands together even more so the pressure from it with the leverage of the floor caused the cuffs to bend out of alignment breaking the electromagnetic connection and I simply twisted the bent bridge of the cuffs back and forth until it popped clean off.” 

“How…how would you know to do that?” 

“Tungsten carbonite isn’t as strong as many people give it credit. It can hold you nicely unless you know it doesn’t do well against inward pressure on itself, but most people when confined try to pull outwards which makes it you against the metal directly which is why it is proclaimed to be so tough to break through,” Taurus laughed. He crawled over to Jaxen and leaned over to help him break his cuffs by repeating the method. 

“Very impressive,” Darth Vader’s voice spoke. 

They both turned to face the throne which Vader was now sitting on. Where he came from neither of them had the slightest idea but from his angle, he guessed it would appear out of context Taurus was giving Jaxen a hand job or similar. 

“God, you’re creepy when you sneak up on us like that.” 

The Sith Lord didn’t seem bothered by the comment and still stared at them. “You look very exquisite on your knees like that. Since you seem to be the biggest troublemaker out of the two of you _Pranktroopers_ , why don’t I show you some manners?” 

“But I already gave you a blowjob a couple weeks ago. Jaxen hasn’t done it yet. Let him in on some of the action first,” Taurus said, pointing at his partner. 

“Yeah and-WHAT!?!?” Jaxen realized what he said and went from pleading with Vader to glaring lividly at a sheepish Taurus trying to squirm his way out of it by throwing him under the bus. 

Surprisingly, Darth Vader acknowledged him. “That is a valid point actually. Although you have shown what you can do, I wish to see the mastermind behind the pranks at work. Bring him here to me.” 

Jaxen still glared at Taurus but the latter waved it off, “Trust me, it’s not that bad! Just do it and it’ll be over before you know it!” 

“Why are you being a traitor right now?” 

“Would you believe that I want to see this happen mainly to see you in action? Did that kiss from a couple days ago mean nothing as a symbol of trust? Who knows we both might like it. Remember what I said in the elevator. I’m willing to take that chance knowing we’ll at least be together, aren’t you?” 

Jaxen shut up as Taurus somewhat forced him to kneel right between their Lord’s open legs. He fired another look at Taurus who sat beside the throne and gestured to their new master. 

Peering up at Vader from the angle he was at was nothing short of terrifying and he hadn’t really slept with men to know what to do on this side of the pleasure pool. But it seemed his master was in a very generous mood because he took Jaxen’s level of concern into account and began removing his belt and groin armor. He undid the material of his pants hiding his cock and it was already hard. Parts of it had darker coloring from what appeared to be healed burn markings, ouch, but it looked human and big enough to tear his throat apart. 

Jaxen stared between it and Taurus who still smirked, “Go ahead, it’s not as bad as you think. Just takes a while to get used to the taste.” 

“If you say so,” he muttered back. 

“Come, Jaxen. Be my soldier and show me why I chose you,” Vader said. 

Having no other choice, Jaxen did an experimental lick at the tip to collect the pre-cum. He could hear Vader’s breathing turn aroused and his hand came to brush Jaxen’s bangs as the stormtrooper took the head into his mouth. The taste wasn’t what he expected but it wasn’t terrible either. Slowly, he built his way into taking more of Vader’s length down and the hand caressing him began to grip the black hair in a bruising fashion Jaxen couldn’t help but moan at. 

Peering to the side, he could barely see Taurus stroking himself at the sight of him sucking another man off. It was sexy seeing Taurus leaned back and moaning at his display of loyalty. Oddly, Taurus’ armor was still on but his blacks had a huge hole in his crotch area. He must have gotten too impatient to jerk himself than preserve his uniform. 

A sharp jab to the back of his throat made a few tears drip down and he moved faster, resuming eye contact with the dreaded black soulless mask. He suddenly felt pressure on his own cock, like someone was squeezing it yet both his hands were on his lord’s legs. Seeing the free hand of Vader elevated from the arm rest and fingers rubbing together made Jaxen realize he was using the Force on him. 

He never knew it could be used for inappropriate things like this. Where was this information growing up? He would have had a hell of a time with a Force user during his teen and young adult discovery years. 

“Good boy. Keep it up and I’ll give you a treat,” Darth Vader huffed, entangling fingers through his stormtrooper’s hair. 

Jaxen went faster as he felt pressure increasing against his cock. He occasionally jolted his hips forward to stimulate it more. He could hear Taurus groan and shake as he ejaculated which made Jaxen lower his hand to paw at the now uncomfortable groin armor. As the Force brought him over the edge, it seemed Vader timed his own orgasm perfectly. Jaxen gagged slightly as cum filled his throat and Vader held his head down with a tight grip to keep the warmth of his mouth and to prevent him from spitting it out. He swallowed most of it when he was released but some dripped past his lips. 

Darth Vader chuckled and grabbed his chin before he could wipe it off, tilting his face to meet him, “You look absolutely gorgeous with my fluids on you. Too bad I can’t kiss you.” 

“I can,” Taurus spoke up. 

He crawled to Jaxen and licked the remainder of the fluid off Jaxen’s lips before assaulting him with a kiss. He could taste their master and Jaxen at the same time. Vader was apparently enjoying the show, slowly stroking himself hard again at the sight. 

“Taurus, I’m going to kill you,” Jaxen laughed. 

“Why, because you like it? Because I was right?” He purred. 

He began removing Jaxen’s crotch plate but instead of lowering the blacks to his knees like a reasonable partner, Taurus tore a hole in them to reveal his cock and anus. This made Jaxen give him a slight irritated glance. 

Taurus shrugged, “I didn’t want to go through the extra effort of removing your leg armor and all that. Besides, clothed sex is much more fun sometimes and who doesn’t like a person in armor?” 

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” 

Darth Vader patted his lap eagerly, “613, _Taurus_ , come here. Let him watch now.” 

“Yes, Master.” The blonde stormtrooper removed himself from Jaxen and climbed onto Vader’s lap enthusiastically. 

The Sith Lord then called out, “JT-500, RC-301, come forth into the room!” 

The guarding stormtroopers outside entered and both were shocked to see their peers in such vulnerable and enticing positions. They didn’t say anything but both Jaxen and Taurus could tell they were slightly aroused. 

“I need you to relay to Admiral Tarkin that I am transferring to my vessel, Executor, as soon as it arrives. I’ll be taking these two with me. Also, have him contact the bounty hunter Boba Fett. I need him for a job of utter importance.” 

“Yes, my Lord.” 

Even before they left, Darth Vader aligned his cock near Taurus’ entrance and slowly sunk the trooper down. Without proper lube, it hurt but Vader was considerate enough to let him adjust to his length for a minute to Taurus’ relief. Then he started. 

Taurus grunted as Vader made him lift up and slam back down on the large cock. Pain melted into pleasure as he got used to the thrusts and he assumed Vader was by all means pleased because the man’s vocalizer was dimming on and off with wheezes that were probably pants befuddled by the mask he wore. Pretty soon he was bouncing on the lap and laughing, pressing himself closer than anyone would have dared to get to Lord Vader. 

“My Lord, h-how am I doing?” 

“Excellent, my loyal trooper. You look stunning on me, moaning like a whore. Isn’t that what you are, 613? A whore, _my_ whore?” Vader growled erotically. 

“Yes, Lord Vader, I’m your whore! Ahh, please!” Taurus screamed. 

Smiling as Vader increased his pace and Taurus rocked back alarmingly fast, Jaxen kneeled beside them and when he noticed Vader wasn’t planning on doing anything with his legs, he became daring himself. He pressed his hardened cock against the shin of Vader’s boot and began to rub against it. He knew not to touch Vader’s boots by hand even if his master was preoccupied but he settled with balancing himself on the floor. 

Surprisingly, Vader was already aware of what he wanted and indulged him. The leg angled itself to accommodate the leaking member and Jaxen picked up his own pace against it, attempting to sync himself with the thrusts he watched above him. 

“689, are you an Akk dog? I didn’t think you liked being treated like a bitch in heat. Maybe we should get you a collar and a leash. Red is your favorite color if I recall. Fitting, a red collar for my new pet.” 

Jaxen moaned at the thought as Taurus panted towards completion. Vader had all but taken over and roughly forced him down on his cock to the hilt. The only thing Taurus could do was grasp at Vader’s arms for support. 

“This was worth the wait, all the trouble you two gave me. I will use you until the only words you’ll be able to say is ‘Master’ but I am patient enough to draw this out as long as possible,” Vader breathed. 

Taurus came with a particularly hard thrust and Jaxen felt release not long after, unloading on Vader’s boot with a heavy blush and groan. Vader continued a few more intense seconds before his vocalizer completely stalled. Orgasm spilling over inside Taurus, Vader pressed the forehead of his mask against Taurus’ like a kiss of sorts. 

Once he regained his composure and the systematic haunting breaths returned to normal, he let Taurus slip off him and try to walk only to sink to his knees to Vader’s amusement. Jaxen huffed but didn’t move. 

“I hope my pets haven’t worn out yet. You still need to clean the messes you’ve made and I need to get to a meeting in less than an hour. I suggest you boys hurry.” 

Jaxen made eye contact with Taurus who was teasing his ass with cautious fingers as Vader’s cum dripped from it. They both peered up at Vader who did indeed have remnants of their own ejaculation on him. They could hear a low chuckle as they both sighed. 

In ten minutes, Darth Vader emerged spotless with some shinier areas on his armor and clothing than normal but nothing truly out of place. “I will be back in two hours. Be ready for me when I return.” 

Nearly thirty minutes after Vader left, Taurus shakily wiped himself off with a strained laugh, “That was more fun than I expected.” 

“Not bad,” Jaxen quipped. “But it sure drains a lot out of you.” 

“True. Say, isn’t there a raid happening in the next hour or so on Ithor? My team said the other day it was going to be today.” 

The black haired stormtrooper paused his cleaning. “Yeah? Why would you ask that unless…no, oh no. We’ve already given Lord Vader enough of a chase. If he finds out we left again, he’ll be pissed.” 

Taurus gave him a sly smirk, “I wouldn’t say pissed. Remember, he’s intoxicated by us because we’re so unruly. We’ve given him such a run that I think he secretly enjoyed the chase, gave him something to do other than watch and wait like he’s been doing trying to find those stupid Rebel bases. So do you really think he’s going to hate the idea that we want to be punished by escaping and giving him another chase for fun?” 

The other man narrowed his eyes, “You’re insane, you know that?” 

“But if I wasn’t, you wouldn’t be my friend.” 

“And we wouldn’t be here planning on how to go back onto the field without getting killed.” 

Taurus scoffed, “For the last time, he won’t kill us. He likes us too much. So I’m just going to use that against him.” 

“Oh yeah, that’s definitely not going to blow up in our faces,” Jaxen said, shaking his head. He toyed with his torn blacks before an idea hit him. “Hey, do you think they have cameras in here?” 

Both of them immediately scanned the room and no such devices or wayward probes were visible. “Nada.” 

“Good, because I would certainly hate for Lord Vader to see how incredibly daft his other stormtroopers can be.” 

They then looked at each other before both smiled widely as if they read each other’s mind. Taurus turned towards the door and whistled loudly to call the guarding troopers on the other side. At first no one responded and he was about to whistle again but then the door opened with one stormtrooper at the entrance and the other peeking around the corner behind him. 

“Well, if it isn’t our Lord’s favorite concubines. What the hell do you two want?” 

Jaxen played up his fake desperation and open his legs seductively, “You.” 

The stormtrooper guard was taken back and hesitated to approach. The second guard entered the room as Taurus revealed himself as well. They could tell the other troopers were eyeing their nether regions quite intensely. 

“Why don’t you come over here and play with us. We’re so horny and I don’t think our Lord satisfied us enough,” Jaxen mewled. 

The first guard began taking a few steps forward before he was stopped by his partner. “No JT, Lord Vader will kill us if he finds out we slept with what is his.” 

Taurus purred, “But we won’t tell if you don’t.” 

The stormtrooper guard, JT-500, finally decided to go ahead and remove his helmet revealing brown scruffy hair before approaching Jaxen with obvious arousal. He knelt between Jaxen’s legs and the latter grabbed his head delicately, making the guard trooper think he was about to receive a kiss. 

The other trooper, who must have been RC-301, gave up trying to stop his inevitable desire too and approached Taurus while removing his helmet. As soon as he was eye level with him, Taurus put on a wicked smirk to the other’s confusion. The smirk turned determined and the only thing the trooper could see what Taurus’ head rushing towards him and a sickening crack was heard. 

\-------------------------------- 

Darth Vader scoured the wreckage of the battle. Many rebel starships and bodies were visible, another victory for the Empire. It had been longer than he expected but he won nevertheless as he predicted. With adrenaline coursing through his veins, he was ever eager to go back to his awaiting slaves who were no doubt waiting for him. 

When he landed on the Death Star, he immediately walked towards his chambers as several Imperial personnel kept up with him including Admiral Tarkin. “I take it the battle went smoothly?” 

“Yes, there were little casualties on our front. The Rebel Alliance is losing its edge. Soon we will crush what little they have left to defend.” 

“And may I ask, how are your new slaves holding up?” 

Vader’s breath hitched a bit too loudly at the mention of them. “They are sufficient. They have proven to be quite the pair.” 

The other officers nodded as they split off but Admiral Tarkin followed Vader back to check on the former stormtroopers. It was such a loss to get rid of such talent but it suited the troublemakers to get what they deserved. It was only fair. 

When they reached his chambers, he half expected the two Pranktroopers to be lollygagging about in boredom naked or partially armored. Instead to his surprise and Tarkin’s, there were two bodies, one bloody. It was obvious it wasn’t them because one man had brown hair and neither had that trait. The bodies must have been the guards. 

Stripped of their uniforms and weapons, it was assumed that both slaves had taken the suits and escaped. How they did it could be determined by their handiwork. The one bloody body to the right lying down was bleeding from the forehead; no doubt a force strong enough to break the skull had been applied there. That was Taurus. Vader had heard of the man’s brutal fighting techniques but it was an interesting sight to see it in person. Blunt force trauma to the skull…the man was dead. The second body, however, had no marks except from a few bruises and appeared to still be alive but unconscious. That was Jaxen. Jaxen didn’t care for causing unnecessary harm if it could be avoided though that didn’t mean he couldn’t if absolutely needed. 

“What happened here?” Tarkin mused. 

Darth Vader merely grunted in understanding, “They must have tricked my guards and swapped places with them. Clever. The chase is on again and I will relish each second of it. They certainly know how to push my boundaries and leave a man wanting.” 

Then both men saw the writing on the wall above the dead trooper, written in his blood. 

_We are not slaves, we are soldiers._

“I’ll give them credit for being bold enough to stand up to you, Lord Vader, but also quite foolish.” 

A coughing sound was heard and their attention turned to the formerly unconscious trooper with the bruises. “W-what…happened? L-Lord Vader!?” 

The trooper became hysterical and tried to stand at attention despite having little to no balance and being completely naked. “I-I tried to stop them! I swear!” 

Vader wasn’t stupid. He knew the man was lying. He didn’t say anything as he lifted his hand and the man’s throat collapsed. The trooper struggled in his grip before falling still and Vader tossed him to the side. 

“I want a cleanup crew here now and I want all known on site deployment schedules for planets and spacecraft to see if our runaway slaves are having fun elsewhere or keeping quiet here,” he spoke with a little more enthusiasm than Tarkin would have liked to hear. 

It was a game Vader expected would turn out like this. He quite frankly had no problems with playing against them. It was something he was looking forward to. Now it was time to see how long they could last away from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut was coming, you all knew it. Why avoid the inevitable?


	4. Poor Decisions

Rebels were trying desperately to outmaneuver the AT-AT units on the ground by foot, going where the machines could not. It was leaning towards a Rebel victory and the officers of the Imperial Army were losing hope. 

“We can’t push them back with so many ground forces tripping up our AT-AT walkers! We need more gunfire on the ground, not the skies!” 

Another Imperial officer scowled, “If we divert all remaining craft to the ground forces, we put our space stations at risk which will hinder our hold on this sector. We cannot risk it!” 

The other officers groaned as Rebel attackers blew up a downed AT-AT. They were indeed losing ground and fast. 

Unknown to the Rebels and to the confusion of a few Imperial squads, two wayward stormtroopers casually walked away. No one stopped them as they snuck near a pipe coupling sticking out of the ground that gave access to the vast network of pipes across the area. Bringing a wagon full of paint, scatter bombs, and some sort of device, the two removed the coupling’s hatch and fed the pipe the bombs. 

“What the hell are those two doing?” 

“Wait a second, that can’t be who I think it is, is it?” 

“No, that’s impossible.” 

While one stormtrooper kept feeding the pipe bombs filled with paint, the second sat next to the sand and played with the unknown device. He typed something and made a quick gesture to his peer. 

“Excuse me, trooper, what exactly do you think you are doing?” An Imperial officer approached with a frown upon his face. 

“We’re cleaning out the pipes, sir. And I suggest if you want to save your AT-AT units as well as the remainder of your men, you may want to fall back to the hillside or say goodbye to your entire squadron.” 

The officer growled, “Is that a threat?” 

“No, I request for your sake and the sake of our victory. You wouldn’t want Lord Vader knowing you stopped a plan that could win you this battlefield for the Empire, would you?” 

That shut the officer up and he swallowed his pride, simply nodding, “Very well, don’t make me regret this.” 

The stormtrooper with the device removed his helmet to the shock of the officer. Jaxen smiled, “You have our word.” 

Setting up the plan was hard but executing it afterwards was all too easy as Imperial troops retreated to the far hills. The Rebel scum thought they were driving the Empire away, little did they know they were in danger. With the battlefield holding nothing but Rebel fighters, the two stormtroopers lied on their fronts over a ridge far from the pipeline complex. 

Jaxen, his helmet back on, turned to Taurus and held up the remote detonator. “Boom.” 

_*Click*_

Rebel troops ran across the battlefield, the edge of victory near. But in one blink of an eye, the entire field blew up in an array of colors and the ground was shattered in multiple directions from a central point. Pipes burst out of the dirt and sent shrapnel flying, a majority of it hitting the Rebel members and killing them instantly. Others were severely injured by the explosion while some were sent airborne from the blast, dying from impact wherever they landed or whatever they hit in the process. Rebel-dug ditches were all but caved in, the droids and the machinery at their disposal destroyed, and their only ships on the ground were decimated. 

The Imperial Army stood stunned at the display as the survivors and remaining Rebels fled the scene. Some even cheered not knowing how it occurred. Tarkin was the first to get the news and it only took him a few relayed details to figure out who was responsible for such a victory. 

Every officer and stormtrooper knew about them, and every single one knew about Vader looking for them. To everyone’s surprise, they revealed themselves to earn a victory for their team despite the search. They risked their identities for the Empire. Even the elite like Tarkin had to admit they were some of the best soldiers out in the field. 

“The Pranktroopers come through again. They snuck onto the battlefield, rigged the main pipelines to emulate a concentrated scatter blast through them, and they killed over two hundred Rebel members. They did their duty and vanished without a trace again. Admirable isn’t it, Lord Vader?” 

The Sith Lord darkly huffed, “They must have bypassed security on the attacking party by either taking other troopers’ numbers or simply snuck on board and returned with the shuttle. They clearly are trying their best to out fox me. I’ll admit they are winning so far.” 

“But what is a game without some competition? They are feistier than Princess Organa and have ten times the courage than an entire platoon of stormtroopers. I hate to say this, my Lord, but did you really think out of an army of troops, not one of them would ever be a match for you?” 

“There is still plenty of time for the tables to turn and I am patient enough. I will win in the long run. You will see.” 

Tarkin merely nodded and peered at the screen scanning the destruction that ensued. He felt a small smile tug at his lips in amusement. 

\---------------------------------------- 

Jaxen and Taurus lied low but were bored enough to cause trouble every so often. None of their superiors knew where they were but they confirmed to every single one of them they were still in the Imperial Army, just a bit more rogue than the others would have liked. So far, every stormtrooper and their brother wanted to binge the favoritism by bringing them in to Lord Vader for a reward. Some team of theirs. 

“What crazy and possibly harmful pranks are we going to pull today? I ask because I am hungry and I really don’t want to draw any attention to ourselves at the moment so have to know if there’s anything diabolical processing in that thick single celled mind of yours,” Jaxen complained. 

“Aw, well ain’t that sweet. Jaxen’s getting all sentimental on me, must be your time of the month I suppose,” Taurus laughed. 

“Seriously though, Vader is hiring stormtroopers to spy on us. Now I don’t know about you but that’s a red alert right there we have the lead and he’s getting pissed off. Maybe we should tone it down or not do pranks at least on the Death Star because we have no place to run if we fuck up.” 

The blonde trooper scoffed, “Yeah, getting to rub one off with the dark lord is really that much of an inconvenient punishment…my god, do you know who you sound like? Like my sister, rest in peace big sis, who always told me ‘watch what you do because karma will always be waiting to screw up your day.’ I try not to look at the downsides of things. He fucks us, we escape, and we repeat the process. It’s not that bad. He likes it, I can tell.” 

“No, no, and hell no! That’s not going to be my life because of your brashness. You want it, get yourself caught. I am not going that far again,” Jaxen huffed. 

Taurus made a fake pouting face, turning towards him with a tilt of the helmet. Even though Jaxen couldn’t see it, he knew instinctively it was a mocking face. 

“Oh, is poor wittle Jaxie afraid of the big bad Sith lord? Yikes, it’ll be tough to do those pranks without you. It’ll be lonely and what if I miscalculate the detonation times in battle and blow myself to pieces?! I’ll be alone, forever…in an unmarked grave…with no one beside m-” 

“Okay, okay, alright, stop with the pity death talk. I hate how you know it’s a weakness of mine to even think about you dead. I can’t stand that! Fine, I’ll be your mechanic and all that with the pranks you and I plan but when it comes to Vader, you are going, not me.” 

The other stormtrooper put a hand on his armored chest over the location of his heart. “I knew you cared and hey, glass half full, we have fun in the process.” 

“I have a love hate relationship with you and sometimes I just want to-Ah!-strangle you to death!” 

“Yes but you’re my strangler and Vader would be proud of you,” Taurus smirked. 

“Speaking of which, there’s an assignment on Naboo many squadrons are being dispatched at and Vader is said to be going with them. Since you seem so keen on being a pest to him and under the gracious foolishness of my love for you I have to monitor you, why don’t you go to Naboo and stir up some chaos and see what our dear old master thinks.” 

Taurus chuckled lowly, “Is this your suggestion of a date?” 

“Call it a vacation from hiding. To my worst judgement, and I know this is going to backfire somehow, I think it’s time to speed this game along don’t you?” 

“You read my mind after all, dear.” 

That hour they planned and snuck onto a ship undocking with Naboo as its target. It didn’t take much of a brain to figure out Vader was on board too. It took ten hours to reach Naboo from the Death Star’s location across the galaxy. It was long enough to give them time but also take drastic risks. A few close calls almost spoiled the surprise but they were keen enough to keep him occupied from discovering them early, say a few false leads and some stirred up trouble amongst the other troopers that made it look like a few squads were out for blood. Thankfully, another matter drew Vader’s attention as well. 

Naboo’s smaller villages had a notorious rebellious streak and Imperial forces were sent practically every other week there to keep the peace. Darth Vader sometimes accompanied them for reasons unknown but no one questioned it. Being rebellious themselves, the Pranktroopers were bold enough to accompany the Sith lord without getting caught as a mockery of their game. Otherwise, it was the perfect venue to rest for the time being. There often wasn’t much to fear there and the Imperial occupation kept its hold on Naboo tight. The planet was rich with agriculture, fair politics as a system could have, and the scenery was gorgeous. 

“I fucking hate this planet.” 

Jaxen crinkled his facial features under his helmet in slight confusion and a sigh emitted from him. “Way to be subtle.” 

They walked casually down the barren alleyways away from lingering eyes of the other stormtroopers and officers. Taurus had his gun perched up ready to fire and Jaxen calmly strolled with his gun by his side. 

“Do you think Lord Vader is a sore loser?” Jaxen asked. 

Taurus didn’t reply but instead shrugged. They peered around for any wayward souls stupid enough to try and sneak out of their houses when a strict curfew was supposed to be in effect. 

“I think he’s starting become anxious but he won’t admit it. I saw him grab a soldier’s neck physically, not by the Force, and slam the guy into the ground before placing the nose ridge of his helmet against the dead trooper’s like sort of a lustful regret-type gesture. We’re winning and he can’t admit it bothers him.” 

“I mean you would do the same if I outsmarted you constantly and you’re the smartest out of the two of us, in fact most of our battalion,” Taurus countered. 

Jaxen tilted his head in appreciation before saying, “Aw, thank you. I love you too man.” 

The blonde stormtrooper suddenly stopped and put an arm across Jaxen to stop him as well. They both looked at each other before Taurus spoke up, “Did you hear that?” 

“No.” 

“I think he’s nearby. Vader is nearby. Isn’t an Imperial camp on the other side of one of these walls? The northern sector? This must be Hyproxi Street because an encampment is just off to the side. Vader must be debriefing them.” 

Jaxen scoffed, “How can you tell?” 

“I heard his voice but it was echoed and kind of dim but I heard it,” Taurus insisted. “Come on, let’s go up to the roof. There won’t be any guards on the eastern outskirts due to it being a waterway which no one is stupid enough to try and ambush them through.” 

Climbing the buildings was no easy feat and the armor they wore was restrictive enough to cause major discomfort in certain angles. A few times one of them nearly slipped off. The roof, as Taurus predicted, was barren and overlooking the compound though sentry guns were in place designed to recognize stormtroopers from locals. They wouldn’t fire on their designated peers. 

Jaxen leaned against the roof’s railing and gazed upon the distant meadows that stretched below the cliffs the city sat on to the horizon. Green was the farthest thing the eye could see north of their position. It was better than seeing grey and white most of the time. 

“Hey Jaxen, look who it is. The big guy himself is here.” 

“Taurus, please don’t do anything to give us away yet.” 

“Yet? I thought you didn’t want his attention at all?” 

Jaxen sighed heavily, “I don’t but I know there is nothing stopping you from completely driving his attention towards us. It’s going to happen without a doubt but can we please not do it at this particular moment?” 

Taurus giggled low to himself and walked a few feet away. “Always the conservative of us. Wait Jaxen, I have an idea!” 

“Please, please do not do this to me. Not now,” the stormtrooper groaned. 

“It’s good, I promise. What if we hail him from that large complex on the other wall-” 

“No, uh-uh, nope.” 

“-And we lean on the building’s upper balcony taunting him to show how superior we are. It’ll screw with him so bad and make him lose himself among the troops. His reputation would be kind of wrecked but it’ll be funny to see his resolve crack at his impatience and determination to get us back.” 

Jaxen leaned towards Taurus with a growl. “If I have to give Vader another blowjob because we get caught by this stunt, I will crush your windpipe!” 

“No you won’t and I know why. You secretly liked servicing him too. You liked putting on a show for him, you liked how he paid you some mind like an actual identity among a nameless army, and you liked hearing him say your name. You are like me, you want this deep down and I am taking the initiative to have some fun before I may get killed in battle or other. You can accept it or deny it all you want but we go down together and I wouldn’t press you into doing something you didn’t want to do if I knew you didn’t like it…and I know you.” 

Silent, Jaxen stared at him as he nodded with no doubt a grin beneath the helmet. Deep down, he didn’t know how he felt about the situation but he had a bad feeling he was next to be fucked by Vader if they were caught, not something he was looking forward to in life. 

“So, are you a man or are you a porg? Which one do you want Vader to treat you as?” Taurus gestured, walking backwards before turning on his heel and continuing towards the building his so called plan was going to be carried out. 

Jaxen sighed and ran to catch up. As they perched upon the tall building, both of them caught sight of Vader and he was pointing fingers at officials and stormtroopers alike. Even the great Admiral Tarkin was there meaning it must have been a very important briefing. Jaxen activated a rigged radio that could hack into any stormtrooper’s feed within several miles, a personal invention of his, and targeted the trooper just to the left of the Sith Lord to catch what he was ranting about now. 

“...ing...fol... How hard is it to find a Rebel in this city? Scour the...an-” Jaxen tweaked the frequency to keep it from wandering from the trooper assigned. “And Admiral, I know they are here somewhere. I can sense them and I want them immediately!” 

“Talk about being on the wanted list from Darth Vader himself,” Taurus laughed, “He is going stir crazy, ain’t that just the funniest thing? To be fair, he’s not wrong. We’re riiiight here.” 

The technician scowled, “So what are you going to do that’s going to get us chased again?” 

“Watch and learn.” 

“Oh brother, here we go. I really need to find some new friends.” 

Taurus stood up and leaned against a beam holding the upper roof and gave a loud whistle while Jaxen remained casually sitting with one leg tucked near his body and the other dangling from the side. A majority of the stormtroopers visible turned their attention to them as Taurus waved back. Darth Vader seemed to hesitate before turning as well, his red tinted visor glaring at them. 

“We’re very appreciative that you care about us, my Lord, so much that we’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and our positions! Listen, we have a job to do and so do you. Why don’t you just admit we’ve outsmarted you long enough and we let bygones be bygones?” 

Vader snarled, “If you’re smart as they say, you’ll be good soldiers and submit to me right now. Otherwise, I will not stop until I find a way to trap you forever and you will be subjected to court martials and severe punishments.” 

Taurus stared down and muttered to himself and Jaxen, “Wow, he’s not as desperate as I thought.” 

“The guy has restraint, this surprises you?” Jaxen scoffed, “He’s not going to make a fool of himself in front of his army and admit defeat. Hell no. You didn’t think that plan through, did you? The only thing we’ve just done is alerted him to our positions and he’s going to come after us with fury.” 

“Give me a few more seconds then we’ll book it.” 

“Oh my god-” 

Taurus then spoke loudly, “Buddy, we ain’t coming down until we hear three little words: I admi-” 

“You are mine!” Vader growled in a husky low voice. 

“...Not what I was thinking-Jaxen, we should probably run.” 

Jaxen turned off his equipment and jumped up from his spot. “Don’t need to tell me twice!” 

“Well, Lord Vader, unfortunately in that case-!” Taurus quickly turned to his partner, “How fast can you hotwire a ship?” 

The other trooper whimpered in frustration at the question, gesturing angrily at Taurus. 

“After them!” Darth Vader roared. 

Both stormtroopers ran like hell to the edge of the roof and slid down the tiles, uprooting some of the fixtures caught by their boots before Jaxen caught the last beam, grabbing Taurus and swinging them to lessen their fall. They angled a dive into a controlled roll onto the street before sprinting away. 

They could hear stormtrooper squads becoming riled up and preparing to hunt them down. The chances of escaping to the Death Star’s corps before they were ratted out was slim to none. 

“I have a plan!” Jaxen said. 

They both ducked into an ally as Taurus wheezed, “Yeah, take the reins because I’m not allowing myself any more scheming after that!” 

“No, no, you aren’t allowed to scheme for the next several years. You are banned from scheming any plans ever again. So, here’s mine: we know we can’t take the Imperial ships fast enough will all those troopers after us. Chances of us outrunning all of them especially Darth Vader not far behind, also impossible but we can blend in. If we can do a roundabout and come out after a group of troopers pass, we could blend in undetected and might be able to delay our capture longer.” 

They slowed to a brief walk when they slipped into a narrow path. 

“Got to love these Naboo back-water alleys. They know how to make escapees feel appreciated.” 

For what felt like hours and possibly was, both Pranktroopers kept low and dodged any visible stormtrooper parties searching the city for them. Darth Vader, despite his obsession, never made another appearance for the duration of their stay. 

At one point, Jaxen tried to hijack an Imperial scout ship only to find Grand Admiral Tarkin talking on board with one of the pilots. The idea was quickly abandoned and both troopers turned quick on their heels to exit the area before anybody recognized them. Another attempt was the Excavator, a higher functioning Imperial battle ship...Vader’s 501st and several Elite Troopers were guarding it and as powerful as Taurus was, he was no match for that many Elites nor the well-trained 501st with their incredibly impressive kill count and success rate. They would have creamed them in under two minutes. 

Out of options, they made their way through the slum district of the city where poor and often forgotten classes resided, nowhere as beautiful as the fabulous towers and outposts near the cliff drop-off where that lush valley was. 

Taurus walked past a semi-open door but back-tracked to pause right in front of it. “Hey, Jaxen, I think this house is empty. We could hide here for a while.” 

The black-haired stormtrooper grimaced, “What?! No, we have to keep moving or we’ll get caught!” 

“But what if that’s what they’ll anticipate? They know we aren’t fools so they know we’ll keep going. They won’t expect us to stop but an idiot would and we...” Taurus gestured at Jaxen to continue. 

Jaxen slowly nodded, “...we aren’t idiots and Vader knows it.” 

The blonde trooper took off his helmet and pressed his back against the wall next to the open door. “If we can’t get off this planet, we might as well settle down for a day and make them believe we made our way back to the Death Star. We’ll get back later-” 

“Or how about we don’t go back at all.” 

Taurus blinked and confused, turned to Jaxen with an expression of disbelief, “I’m sorry, what?” 

“Think about it, Taurus, we are on Naboo, a home-stretch for trade and Rebels alike. We talked once about finding a better life, why not use this opportunity to live free instead of soldiers. We keep returning to that Death Star and Vader will keep pursuing us. He won’t stop as long as we are in that army so why not quit?” 

“Give up, you mean?” 

“Save our asses! Do you really want to be a sex slave to a Sith Lord for however long you’re useful?” Jaxen spat, glaring at his friend with distaste. 

Taurus motioned two fingers to his head. “Sure, kill me now. No I don’t want to be used only for sex but I think the reason it seems that way is because we keep running from Vader. Think about it, we only were with him for an hour or two. Yes, we had sex with him-well I had sex with him, you only sucked his dick so that doesn’t actually count per say-but that was in that one hour. What about a whole day? What is going to happen if we spend a week with him?” 

Jaxen remained silent, occasionally looking to the side as Taurus continued. “One of the problems about you I noticed since I met you is that you always assume a certain possibility and you think it’ll be the only outcome because you did calculations. You are smarter than most of us but you are very short-sighted. I’m not saying you’re wrong but you need to learn to take chances a bit more, can’t live your life and all the choices you make to probabilities. Sorry, you needed to hear that.” 

“But you assume I’ll like it, being Darth Vader’s pet and all?” Jaxen said, “If we’re talking problems, we can dive kind of into your situation of you should learn to keep your opinions and thoughts low key. You are so boisterous and you just run head long into danger, not even thinking of the consequences like, for instance, revealing our location to Vader. Not the smartest idea considering you didn’t even ask if that is what your partner wants, if I wanted to do that. You need to stop thinking that everyone wants the same as you.” 

“Yes but-” 

“But nothing! I warned you not to go after the rookies but you couldn’t help yourself and now, we’ve been chased, fucked, and exhausted from keeping ourselves in check ever since. I said we could do it later but you also didn’t listen despite I offered to do it when I was ready and when there was no threat! Taurus, I love you man but you have to look at things sometimes before you do them because whatever you do afterwards, will affect everyone you care about for good or bad.” 

Taurus, under the brutal honesty, rubbed his temples and eyes. He faced Jaxen with a serious but soft face. Slowly, he nodded, “I just...like you and me doing pranks and chaos together that I never think you’re ever on a different page than me. I always did what I did because I thought that it would make you look at me as the best friend who didn’t need to rely on you for help, that I had the capabilities to do just as good as you and make you proud. I didn’t think I was hurting you.” 

“Taurus, you are my best friend and I will always be yours, but if I tell you not to do something, I’m doing it out of concern. You are right that I’m not as open as I should be which gives you the impression instead of being helpful, I’m just holding back. But what’s funny is that despite these flaws, we’ve always come through. We’ve always beaten the odds as a team and a very effective one as that. So slave or trooper, we belong together.” 

The trooper laughed, “Hell yeah, we do. I think it was good we got this off our chests. What’s a team if we can’t communicate the rights and wrongs of how we feel about what each teammate does?” 

“Exactly,” Jaxen smiled. 

After a second of silence, Taurus pointed to the door, “You think we should go inside, see if we can rest a while?” 

“I’d like that actually, no matter whether we come out tomorrow with no patrols or we are caught before morning, I need to rest.” 

“Uh, the more I think about, the more I’m with you on that being a stormtrooper is overrated,” he said. 

They both started laughing with Taurus gripping Jaxen’s shoulder playfully. After a brief fit, Jaxen became somewhat serious upon entering the house. The door rumbled open upon activation but the room was surprisingly empty sans a couch that was partially covered. 

“Hello?” Taurus called out. 

With no reply, they kept close and visited each room. One kitchen that had a broken table and some cookware on the floor, a shower room that had a few stains from wall damaged but as Jaxen turned the lever found it had water still running, and they found a bedroom last. A few cobwebs and some rips in the wall made it apparent the house was abandoned but the condition of the bed, the vibrant blue on the walls, and the floor not being caked in dirt meant it was within the month that the residents had left. 

“The people must have been part of the slum raid. I thought most occupants had moved back but apparently not,” Taurus noted. 

“That or they didn’t make it and this place was cleared for valuables.” 

“Yikes, so we sharing the bed?” 

Jaxen gave Taurus an amused smirk, “Oh, you get the couch definitely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slowly but surely working on this along with a million other fics I just got inspiration to do and now regret.


End file.
